Snorry Night
by StarrGazer47
Summary: What would happen if the Team was stuck in a tiny bunkroom aboard a ship?  Would they be able to survive the night without killing each other?


This is just a fun scene that I have not been able to get out of my mind so I had to write it out. I thought it would be fun to see what would happen to the team if they were stuck together in a bunkroom for a night on a ship. Should be interesting.

**I do not own NCIS, becuase if I did Tony and Ziva would have been hooking up since the end of season 3!**

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Deep, heavy snoring rattled through the room, cutting through the penetrating silence only found in the dead of night. The sound ripped the air like a chain saw, causing even the most deep of sleepers to toss and turn. It was a noise to wake the dead.

Timothy McGee tossed and turned in the tight bunk trying to find some escape from the noise. If it didn't stop soon, he would never fall asleep and then tomorrow Gibbs would be pissed that he was so tired. It was time to put an end to this.

"Tony! Tony!" McGee called across the bunkroom, attempting to wake his teammate. Tony shifted in his bunk but did not wake. McGee resumed calling his name. When this proved futile, he pulled his pillow from beneath his head and threw it across the room. It hit Tony square in the face and he jumped up, knocking his head on the top of his rack.

"What, McGee?" Those in the know, knew it was best not to wake Tony if you wanted to live a long life. Tony growled at McGee and rubbed his head, using his other hand to toss the pillow back at McGee, who dropped it onto the floor. "Well, what the hell do you want?"

McGee stared down at his pillow longingly, but was snapped back to attention by Tony's snarl. "Just wanted to see if you were awake." McGee answered pathetically.

"Well I am now! Probie, what is your problem?"

"I don't know how you and Gibbs can sleep through this racket! If she doesn't stop, I'm never going to get any sleep tonight." Tony's eyes went down to the bunk beneath McGee's where Ziva David slept with a peaceful expression across her face. It was amazing that she could look so serene when she was creating that awful sound.

Tony chuckled as McGee's voice rose an octave or two giving away his annoyance. "I guess you just get used to it." Tony suggested. He rolled over onto his side preparing to go back to sleep.

"That's impossible. It's like a freight train is rumbling through my head! My bed is actually vibrating."

"People pay good money for that McWhiner! Now go to sleep and leave me alone!" Tony turned away from McGee, hoping he would get the hint and leave him alone.

"Gibbs actually looks happy. Come on Tony. You have to do something!" McGee looking down at their boss, sleeping in the bunk beneath Tony. He had been the first one to hit the rack and had been sleeping with a small smile on his face the whole time. It baffled McGee, just what this man could sleep through.

"Why do I have to do something? It's your problem, you do it!"

"If I go down there, Ziva will shoot me in her sleep!" McGee swallowed with fear, thinking of Ziva pointing a gun in his face and firing at him, still in her dream state.

"So you want her to shoot me? Thanks a lot McGee! You do it!"

Of course this started a round of "No, you do it" bickering that could only be ended by their fearless leader.

"One of you had better do it, before I shoot you both." Gibbs barked at his two male agents. He was close to physically pulling them out of their bunks and leaving them to sleep in the hallway. The only thing that stopped him was his unwillingness to leave the comfort of his bed.

"Fine, I'll do it. Just to make McCrabby shut up!" Tony snapped back the covers and pulled his legs out of the warmth. He climbed down from the bunk and shot a look of pure venom at McGee, making sure he knew that he would pay for this.

Through this spat, Ziva had slept on, blissfully unaware of the tension she was causing amongst the team. She was sprawled on her back, one foot dangling out of her bunk. Tony crossed the room and knelt down to the sleeping ninja, wondering if he was putting his life in danger. He checked that he had enough room to duck, should she point her weapon at him.

Tony crouched down, watching Ziva's breathing. He mused for a moment about pinching her nose shut, but at the last minute thought better of the idea. He ran his hands inside the covers searching for Ziva's body. She was warm underneath his fingers and he reveled in the feel of her strong muscles. With his left hand he found her shoulder and cupped it. With the other hand he grasped her upper hip, attempting to turn her towards him and onto her side. He had succeeded in turning her part of the way when he felt her body tense. Tony had just awoken a sleeping dragon.

Ziva came immediately to life. She had never been one to remain in dreamland, always able to wake in an instant. She knew exactly who was touching her, his fingers burned into her flesh like a memory. For a moment she savored the feeling knowing it could not last.

Ziva opened her eyes a fraction, realizing that Tony's face was a mere inch away from hers. She stared at his chin, her eyes tracing a path down his neck. An errant thought flew through her head. How many times had she fantasized about licking that neck, and here it was, right in front of her. All she had to do was reach out. But she restrained herself, like always.

Up above McGee had let out a relaxed sigh, glad that the snoring had finally ceased. He lay back, unable to see what was going on in the bunk below.

It was time to put an end to this. Tony sat coaxing his hands to move, when Ziva made her move.

Her head tilted a fraction coming up to his ear. He could feel her warm breath on his skin, and the whisper of her curls on his neck. Her lips pressed to his ear, so only he could hear her response.

"As much as I am enjoying the presence of your hands on my body, now is not the time, nor the place for this kind of exploration."

Ziva pulled her head back to look into his eyes. She watched as he swallowed, his adam's apple bobbing up and down.

Tony looked into her eyes, filled with that mischievous sparkle that always riled him up. He smiled back at her, silently promising that this invitation would not go unfulfilled.

With the strength of a saint, he slowly trailed his hands off her body, but not before allowing them to run over her hip and stomach, and down her arm leaving a trail of goosebumps along the way.

Tony turned and reluctantly returned to his own rack, cursing the presence of McGee and Gibbs the whole way. Just as he was about to climb back into his bed, he heard a sound. "What now McGee?"

Tony whipped around and the look on his face stopped McGee short. He began to stutter and was finally able to get out one word. "Pillow?"

McGee looked down at his pillow still lying on the floor next to Ziva's bunk. Tony snatched it up off the floor and threw it at McGee as hard as he could.

As Tony lay in his bunk, he heard McGee finally drop off to sleep. Within twenty minutes Ziva too had fallen back to sleep, and her snores once again ripped through the tiny bunkroom. Tony tossed and turned unable to find comfort or fall back asleep. Thoughts of Ziva and her warm body ran through his mind all night long, taunting him. What had she meant by now is not the time? Would there be a right time in the future? Or was she just playing with him? He blamed McGee for this whole mess and was slowly devising a plan to make him pay for it tomorrow.

The morning dawned finally and Ziva was shocked to see Tony was the first one up, already dressed and getting their gear ready. Gibbs and her shared a look of surprise, as they pulled themselves out of bed.

"Oh McGee, wakey, wakey." Tony went over and gave McGee a slap to wake him up. It was time for payback.

Finally the team was all up and ready. They grabbed their gear and headed out to catch their morning helicopter. Gibbs placed his NCIS cap on his head and turned to Tony. It was clear his senior agent had spent a rough night. Dark circles ringed both of Tony's eyes and his face seemed to sag with the effort to remain upright.

"Hard night, DiNozzo." Gibbs smirked.

"You have no idea, boss."


End file.
